I will pay ten dollars to have an attractive woman spit in my face and tell me that I am useless

It hurts to breathe. Not because there is anything wrong with my lungs, but just because each breath means I have to keep living a little longer. I broke my pinky finger to see how it felt. I liked it. Maybe too much. I will pay ten dollars to have an attractive woman spit in my face and tell me that I am useless. Fuck you, I look good in plaid.

She wakes me up to tell me that I’m dying. Her thin fingers form a brush and push my hair around in a way that is meant to comfort me. Then, when I’m all the way awake, she leaves.

This planet sucks.

I am disintegrating one atom at a time. I have a half life of 6 years.

6666.66 is the saddest number I have ever encountered.

1973 was the worst possible year.

6666.66 / 1973 x 6 = 20.273674

I am rounding here. So is god. But he is a worthless bastard. Fuck him.

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2 Comments

  1. i think i internet love you.

    best title ever.

    i would do it for five.

    Like

    • I internet love you too.

      and: deal

      Like


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