Man on Fire

I set a man on fire once.

I know that that sounds terrible; like I tortured and killed someone, but that isn’t the case at all. He asked me to do it, and I put him out afterwards. My buddy Wally used to be a stuntman. He spent years doing ND stunts (that’s what they call it when you aren’t doubling for one of the stars). As he started to get older, he left the world of stunts mostly behind and moved on to other jobs in the movie industry. He never really got the danger bug out of his system.

A local car dealership contacted Wally to see if he’d be willing to be in a commercial. The idea was that a used car salesman would be set ablaze, suggesting that other dealers deserved that treatment, but this was the place where you would get a fair deal. Wally was up for it (he has his own fire suit, after all), so he called me and a few more friends to help out.

On the day we showed up at the lot, and Wally got into his fire suit, then put loose clothes over it. He covered his hair in some flame retardant goo, then we doused his clothes with rubber cement, and when the camera started rolling we lit him up. He flamed beautifully for about thirty seconds, then his hair started to catch fire. We grabbed the extinguishers and blasted him until the flames were gone. Through it all, Wally never panicked. I was impressed by that.

Afterwards we went back to Wally’s place and started drinking.

This story may not be as exciting as it seemed at the time. It certainly isn’t as terrifying as the opening sentence suggests, but what do you want?

In other news, I’m not sure if this is interesting, or inane: Condron.us, but it seems to just cycle through random blogs for no reason and in no order.

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